Schools/Stepparents/Deployed Spouses...this one is a rant.

I’m starting to see a trend with some of my friends. Their children are having so many problems at school, not because they are getting in trouble or acting out in class, but the administration are causing issues in regards to things that have never been a problem before.

Here’s the example:

Spouse, and the biological father of the children, is currently deployed. Stepmother is dealing with everything by herself, which is the norm when the other half is deployed. Oldest stepson is pulled out of class today and interrogated by the school social worker who wants to know WHY his father did not fill out the paperwork for the school and WHERE is he physically. Now, this child knows that he is not to ever say where his father is when he is deployed…he knows that is a no-no, just as we all know that the sun rises in the East and sets in the West. He states that his father is deployed and that he cannot tell her WHERE he is. Apparently, this was unacceptable.

This social worker then calls mom and leaves a message for her to return her call when she gets the message. Mom does and is told that the social worker is out of the office and they’ll have her call when she returns. Fine. So far, this is acceptable. Now, when she does call back, she proceeds to berate the mom saying that she cannot speak to her, she will NOT acknowledge the power of attorney she has in her spouse’s absence, she insists on speaking to one of the BIOLOGICAL parents (yes, she repeatedly emphasized that particular word), AND she does not care that she is the stepmom, she is not the BIOLOGICAL parent and she needs to make sure that the children are being “properly cared for” in the absence of their father. Oh, and then stated that she needed a copy of his orders for deployment “to keep on file.”

I’m sorry…WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?!

It would not have been a good thing if someone said something of this nature to me. Not good at all. I may very well have hung the telephone up and driven to the school to find this woman and have a nice chat with her. Beginning with shoving my power of attorney papers up her rear end and informing her that if she DID NOT recognize that LEGAL DOCUMENT that I was about to become a bigger problem for her and she wouldn’t need to worry about if the children were being “properly cared for”, she’d need to be more concerned with keeping her job. And as for requesting a copy of his orders for her file? HELL NO. Schools do NOT get copies of orders. Ever. If she deals with a number of military families, as she says she does, then she knows better than to even ASK for them. As long as the children show up for school, are clean, well fed, homework is done, and they are causing no issues, then there should not be any question as to whether they are being cared for. As for the mountain of papers that she wanted to know why their father didn’t fill them out? He NEVER fills them out…ever. Every year, the mom fills out the paperwork and sends it back to school when they are due. Just like EVERY OTHER MOM! Don’t get me started on the “just a stepmom” or “not a biological parent” comment. Just…don’t.

I know that there are all kinds of people in this world and it’s those differences that make the world go round. I also know that there are some administrations that are lacking in their ability to care and then there are the overzealous administrations that run things like a Nazi camp. I’m going to put this woman in the “overzealous” category. Is she doing her job? I’m sure she is. I’m also sure that this is a family that does not need any added pressure right now. Mom is dealing with her first deployment, has no help because family isn’t near to them (as is common with military families), and is undergoing treatment for cancer. So, no…this family needs nothing else added to their proverbial plate.

I guess I’m just having an issue with why this particular woman is pursuing this. What is in it for her? What is she going to get out of this? And who the hell does she think she is talking to a parent like that? I don’t care if it IS a stepparent, they are still a parent to those children. A mother to kids, who has her own children, and the ONLY mother these kids know because theirs walked out the door and never once looked back and has no contact with them in any way, shape, or form. What is the driving motivation that would make you pull a child from class, interrogate them, and then proceed to make a total ass of yourself? Is this some kind of power trip? Are you new?

Are you an idiot?

The answer to that is yes. Yes, she is.

Oh, dear Lord, it’s times like these that make me remember two things.

1.    The Serenity Prayer

2.    I’m SO glad we home school now!

Now, I’m off here for a little bit. It’s dinner time and I need to play with my puppies!