An ending to another day

So as this day draws to a close, I am left pondering a few things. Nothing of major importance, but still pondering all the same. I wonder if my husband thinks of me as often as I think of him, if he lays in bed at night and thinks about the things we used to talk about before drifting off to sleep, if he misses having someone laying next to him or if it's just me that thinks like that. I wonder if he says a prayer for all of us back here or if he even believes in prayer. I may not believe in a lot of things, but I do believe in the power of prayer. I think we confess some of our greatest fears in prayer and while we can't do anything other than confess them and ask for some type of resolution that we hope to come, I believe that we do this in hopes that there really IS a power greater than ourselves.

I think of my friends and all the trials and tribulations they are going through. I think of the ones that we are going through currently and I truly hope that there is a positive ending. I think about how much I miss my husband and how badly I would love to be able to reach over and just touch his shoulder...just because he would be in the same room and how happy that would make me. I sit at his desk and I think about all the times he would sit here and do whatever it was he would do. I don't actually know because when he would sit here, I would leave him alone, thinking that he was studying or doing something uber important. My mind is just bouncing all over the place tonight!

Britney is still broken out in hives this evening. It comes and goes in waves and it makes NO sense to me. I just want my little girl all better. I hate seeing her like this because she is miserable. I did try to make her feel a little better by taking her to the movie rental store and letting her pick out some movies. She picked out Paranormal Activity, My Sisters Keeper and I chose All About Steve with Sandra Bullock. She watched her two movies already and is now resting.

I have spent my afternoon hauling crap out of the office, unpacking boxes, putting bookcases together and attempting to get the office in a working condition. Walking in here day after day and seeing all these boxes that needed to be unpacked was driving me insane! Right now it's in chaos because for some reason, you have to make a mess of a room BEFORE you actually clean it up. I still don't understand that concept, but whatever...it's getting done. Now if I could only find that box cutter I have misplaced...lol. Well...off to the grindstone again! I hope to finish this room before going to bed. Later all!

Reading about my husbands adventures

So I just finished reading a blog that my husband posted on Facebook for all his friends to see and read. He recently traveled to Cox's Bazaar in the country of Bangladesh to visit some medical clinics that are being funded by the U.S. He also did a little sight-seeing and was able to visit some of the Buddhist Temples, where he was blessed by a monk for his travels over the next year and to return home safely. I have to say, I like the monk and what he did for my husband. Reading about his travels is both exciting and melancholy. I am excited that he gets to see these places and is learning so much about the culture within his area of focus, however; I am melancholy simply because I am not there with him to see and experience everything for myself. I don't mind reading about all of it, but it sure isn't the same when one actually experiences it on their own.

Allow me to give a brief introduction about my husband. His name is Pat and he is a career military officer that is a 48D. What is a 48D? No, it isn't a bra size, although for some I am sure it is, but in his case...it is his official job. I will not explain to you exactly what he is or what he does because I really don't know who all is reading this, just know that he is doing good things in the world and he is enjoying what he does. He does a lot of traveling throughout Asia and other specific areas, which you will not be informed of. He is currently stationed overseas for his assignment and we're about 6 weeks in on a year + deployment, give or take a little time there.

Over the next few weeks, he will begin his actual assignment and hopefully, time will move by a little more quickly for him. In that same time, my kids will be gearing up for their Spring Break and I'll be focusing on where I am going to take them. Right now I am planning on going to Omaha to visit some friends of ours, but they have had some family issues come up that may require them to go back to California for some time. So right now I have no definitive plans to do anything. Although it would be nice to go see a beach somewhere!

Okay, for now I am going to call it and go finish straightening up my house. I still need to mop the floors and get some items out of the house and into storage so I can put bookcases together and get my office officially done so it doesn't feel like constant chaos. Everyone have a great day and I'll catch you on the flip side!

Not much to report today

25 February 2010

I took Britney to her doctor today. She broke out in hives all over her body and was just miserable. Not that her doctor was much help, but he did give her a steroid shot and that helped so much with the hives/welts/redness. Although it did make her quite loopy! She talked out of her head for most of the car ride back home, which was hilarious…hehehe.

The rest of the day was rather uneventful thank goodness! I spoke with my ex-mother in law tonight. She was concerned about Britney and we wound up discussing Celina as well and how we worry about her but hope for the best. Life would be so much easier if things would just work out the way I wish they would and not how they actually are. Of course, if everyone got their way all the time, how boring would that be?

I got to speak with Pat this morning by telephone. I’m glad he is safe during his travels and I love that he will call everyday that we can’t speak via Skype. Although I am sure that I won’t care for the phone bill too much, I am willing to pay it just so that we can talk. I hope he gets to call and talk to Nana this weekend.

Otherwise, not much happened today. We’ll see what tomorrow holds!

Thus is life

We all sit back and for the most part we move forward with our daily lives and give no second thought to anything that happens, unless it is something that really causes pause. We see an accident and we think "I'm glad that wasn't me." or "I hope no one was hurt" but within 5 minutes, we are back to obsessing over our own lives. Not that this is inherently a bad thing, but it makes me wonder about society as a whole these days. No longer do we introduce ourselves to our neighbors and attempt to make friends, nor do we volunteer our time helping others in some fashion. I'm just as guilty of these things as the next person and probably more so. I am that true loner type with only a very close knit circle of friends, which isn't a bad thing, but it isn't a good thing either. I enjoy socializing with others, but I don't actually want to get to know you or hang out on a regular basis. I'm perfectly acceptable with catching up with some just a couple times a year and some people, even less than that.

However; I need to make the attempt to put myself out there more. Break free of my social barriers or trappings, however you want to word it. Am I comfortable doing this? Absolutely not. This is something that I must do though. A fear that I must face and overcome if I am to be the wife to my husband for his career. Although he has said that he prefers me to just be me, and I full intend on being who I am, but I also have to realize that I need to be more socially outgoing than I am now. So, not only will I be the wife to an FAO and a mother/step-mother to 4 daughters, but I get to be the arm candy to my husband at any and all social functions that require our presence. Hmph.

Currently, my husband is overseas attending a Staff College. He works out of one of the U.S. Embassies and he is playing the good officer and making the right political connections to forward his career. I am still in the good ole U.S. of A, in my home state with my daughters and am about to file for custody of one of my step-daughters. Nice huh? Oh to have the opportunity to live this type of life! LOL. Seriously though, this isn't a bad life...it just takes some getting used to. I miss my husband terribly and I love my family fiercely. So as I go on this little adventure for the next year, I'll try to post something every day, so that I can look back on my life and see both the good and the bad and try to make my life, truly one worth living.

Until next time!